Awakening after the car accident one of my first questions was, “when can I run again?” Running is not just something I do, it is very much a part of who I am. I run for fitness. I run for mental clarity. I run to feed my competitive nature but most importantly I run for the glory of God (see A Runner’s Purpose). I’m told that I held captive one of my first hospital visitors (sorry Jason) discussing all my upcoming runs.
Running is such a part of my DNA, that I actually carry a “Race Folder”. It contains print-outs, in chronological order, of upcoming races in my purview. Prior to the accident I was registered for two races and had two others on the radar; Sights and Sounds 5K, December 3; New Year’s Day Double 5K, January 1; Texas Half, January 28; and the Baylor Bearathon, March 24. Even in my drugged state I was cognizant enough to realize I’d miss the Sights and Sounds 5K. Too bad because I REALLY wanted a Santa trophy. Having just been released from the hospital, I was not well enough yet to participate in that race, but my precious 17 year old daughter, Brittany, stepped up and ran in my place. Brittany runs a faster mile than I do, but after that mile, she’s done. My heart swells with pride that she volunteered to run 3.1 miles when I could not.
The New Year’s Day Double is an inaugural event in Allen, Texas, my sister’s current hometown. She and my niece have been training couch to 5K and I’d suggested an actual race to test their hard work. We were all registered to run together. Since running in a titanium halo weighing approximately 15 pounds is a suicide mission, I won’t run this race either. HOWEVER I am walking in the race. Race registration included finish time predictions. I guessed 28 minutes and was placed in the second starting corral. Knowing I won’t finish in 28 minutes, I emailed the race director requesting a corral change. I provided all the gory injury details including that I am still in a halo. It took several days for a response, and I was scared they wouldn’t allow me to participate. But as of today, I am moved to starting Corral D (very last). To ensure my safety during the race (I can’t see my feet), my sister and niece have graciously requested corral moves as well. Though I won’t be running, I feel as if this race is one of the most important of my life. It screams loudly that through God, no matter the circumstances, we can overcome and be victorious.
This morning my brother shared a dream he had: he dreamt that I was running a race and he was at the finish line waiting for me. I choose to accept his dream as confirmation that God intends for me to make a full recovery and be back on the track running for His glory. Plus, when our pastor’s daughters, Olivia and Natalia came to visit, they asked if I’d ever run again. I assured them I would and not only that, I would run their race, Chosen Marathon for Adoption again next year.
I may be broken, but I am NOT defeated. God is the great physician and daily he is knitting my body back together. Soon, I will once again, be running with purpose.